Beware: this is another one of my long but educational and hopefully touching posts about what it can be like to spend some time with a child on the autism spectrum who also has some serious ADHD. Keep in mind again the myth that people on the spectrum are unable to feel empathy and the truth that they often are not aware of typically acceptable social behaviors. Yesterday was one of those days when I had to get some errands done in town and I also had both kids with me-many parents of kids with special needs never attempt this and for good reason lol. Brandt had decided to color his face with a permanent marker (still trying to figure out where he got that from). He definitely got a lot of attention from it as well as a lot of stares. I had a friend or 2 ask how I could be so calm about it. Well, I learned a long time ago that I'll go completely insane if I'm constantly letting myself be embarrassed by his behaviors in public. The grocery store was especially brutal. I had a headache and needed to get out of there quickly. He was bouncing all over the place- giving people he knew hugs or staring at them until they noticed his face. Thankfully we have some amazing people in our community who were so patient and kind to him. And thankfully I had Kylie to help me with my shopping and I wasn't having to keep track of her running off or anything. When we finally got to the car and the groceries were in it, buddy took the cart to put it away. He made his way through the parking lot barking and singing as he went and then spent a ton of time arranging the carts at the drop off like he usually does. I was getting super impatient and frustrated with him and was about to seriously lose it by the time he was actually in the car and we were leaving. I drove right past a van with a family holding a sign saying they needed help. I'm embarrassed to say I had no intentions of stopping. Brandt insisted that he wanted to help and started loading up a grocery bag with a few things to give them. I drove a few blocks and then circled back so he could deliver it. Afterward he kept saying how cute the little kids were and how sad it was that they needed help. He was worried that people wouldn't stop to help them because they were from another country. He said he kept having the feeling in the store that we should buy a few extra things because someone might need them but he thought the someone would be us. We talked about how we had also bought a few extra items like donuts and lemon drops that weren't needs but wants and that we need to be more grateful for what we have. This also led to a great conversation with both kids about listening to and following the guidance of the Holy Ghost. We also talked about how Heavenly Father loves all of His children and is pressed when we as kind to others and serve them no matter what they look like or if they are different than we are. Once again my heart was softened by the actions of a little boy who had empathy for someone and acted upon it.
